Factory Reset: Time to Start Over
You know the term factory reset? It's something that you can do on your electronic devices to wipe everything off and get it back to its original settings. It's a restart. It's exactly what I need to do.
I need to take it back to June 2nd. The day before I started Ideal Protein 3 and half-ish months ago. I need to fully remember who I was, the dangerous situation I was in, and why I was desperate to make these life altering changes.
I've forgotten. I've let laziness back in. I've lived in the moment, but not in the good way, and not thought about consequences.
Today is my factory reset. Today I have the opportunity to work for change. Today I have the ability to be strong and make wise decisions.
And I will have those same opportunities tomorrow and the days that follow.
You see, I got scared. I got scared of the success. What if I gain everything back? What if I can't maintain the weight loss? What if I fail?
What if my cholesterol continues to rise even though I was making good choices? What would I do without the products? Would I ever be free of them or too scared to let them go?
I let the "what ifs" take over my thought life instead of asking God to fill my thoughts things that are true, honorable, right, pure, lovely, admirable, and worthy of praise (Phil 4:8).
I haven't been in a good place for the past month and I haven't tried to come back. I haven't been writing and updating this blog because I was embarrassed and didn't want to let you, my wonderful reader-friend, down. It was easier to ignore what I was doing when I wasn't putting it out here.
So here I am. Admitting that this is really hard. That habits are hard to break. That circumstances rise up and you have to deal with them in healthy ways.
Here I am showing you my factory reset. When I say factory reset, what I mean is that I'm going back to the beginning. Going through all of my Ideal Protein paper work that I studied so hard in the beginning. Reminding myself of the rules and they whys. I want to be as enthusiastic and optimistic as I was in the beginning.
Let me share with you some of the reasons why I started this journey:
- I want to be physically healthy. My back aches and my knees hurt from the smallest amount of strain. I'm tired all of the time. I have stomach issues when I consume large amounts dairy and gluten. My body is talking to me and I haven't been listening.
- I want to have children. Where I'm at right now, and especially -35lbs ago, is not a place to have a healthy pregnancy or baby.
- I have high cholesterol. I want it to be lower.
- I want to be spiritually healthy. Everything is connected.
- I want to prove to myself that I'm worth it and I can do it. I don't want to be fearful and I don't want to be scared of failure.
- I want to be a success story. I don't think it's vain to say that or want that. I want to be successful and give glory to God.
I'm ready. Let's go back to the beginning. Let's have a factory reset. Let's not feel shame, but driven to succeed. 3...... 2....... 1..........
Time to work. - JJ